Wednesday, April 18, 2007

Difficulty In Apologizing

How many of us actually apologize whenever we do or say something wrong which upset somebody, whether it be family, friends or even strangers? Frankly, I rarely apologize to my family as I find it extremely difficult to do so. It seems much easier to apologize to my friends by sending him/her a message like “sorry for just now”, “I’m sorry for what I’ve done”, “sorry, I din mean it”, sorry, plz forgive me” etc. However, I find it awkward to say a SORRY, or even send it, write it to any of my family members.

Today, I offended my dad by saying something stupid (which I prefer not to mention) during dinner time. The moment I uttered it, I knew there’s gonna be a disaster. Bad, bad, this is really bad. I shouldn’t have said that. Unfortunately I couldn’t keep back what I’ve said. I felt really guilty. I couldn’t face him anymore. I quickly finished my dinner and ran away. Die, die. I didn’t feel like apologizing. I could hardly recall when was the last time I said a “sorry” to my family.

While dad was bathing, mum came forward and lectured me. I knew I was wrong, but it seems so hard for me to admit it infronta her. So I just kept quiet, bite my lips as she lectured me and nodded once in a while to indicate “understood”. After that, I thought I should make my very first attempt to apologize. After an hour or so, finally I took out all my courage to sms him. There weren’t any punctuation between the sentences though. So, you can imagine (no you don’t call it reluctant), I was kinda in a rush while typing the message, trying hard to hide my self-conscious and embarrassment.

So far I haven’t receive any response, probably because it is equally difficult for him to tell me that he has forgiven me too. At least, I’ve forgiven myself. What a relief! I’m really brave this time! Gotta use my brain before I say something next time. Blerkz.

Do not be shy to utter SORRY =)

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

hey,me t00!
i'm n0t used t0 ap0logise n thank my family t00 c0mpared t0 frens!
i guess n0t 0nly u n i will face this situati0n ba...