Monday, September 14, 2009

A Big Decision

I’m about to make a big decision. A simple decision, a matter of yes or no, which despite it’s insignificance to others, would indirectly cause a huge impact in my life. Due to my fickle-minded nature, I have to bear the cost for this. It is no doubt costly, yet not so costly, in relative to the concerns of my future. For so long, I have silently assumed the fact that I’ve made the right choice. I thought things could turn well with a tad bit of determination and tolerance, but my naiveté had proven me wrong the day you failed me! You had been a huge disappointment. I was shattered in tears. Would I have been happier if I hadn’t made such a choice? Sometimes, things happen when they’re least expected. I wiped my tears and gave you a second chance. No, there wasn’t a single promise from you, yet I put on all my hopes, wishing that you would never fail me again. It was a one-sided thought, for amidst the hard work and effort, you have no idea how much I am going to do for you, neither would you appreciate nor repay my kindness.

Just a few more months, I told myself. Just a few more months and perhaps things would eventually turn well. But I knew, it is no longer a matter of time. Each time I glance at you, I feel a tinge of depression. As I looked deeper within, I feel as if my world is collapsing. I have never once gained an insight of you, nor would I ever understand you. You’ve changed. Simplicity is no longer right to describe you. As all the complications slowly barge in, I became lost. For more than one year I struggled. I have overestimated your importance. I thought you could be part of my accomplishment. Nevertheless, you’re the destructive one that could threaten the future promises. Would I be stupid to keep holding on and give up on what life is about to offer? Today, with my never-ending excuses, I have come to a conclusion that I shall be better off without you.




With that, I proclaim, I am dropping Business Studies from my A-Level’s!

HAHAHAHAHAHA. You don’t get it, do you? What were you thinking, seriously! LOL.

Gosh, I hope it’s not too late to make amendments. Another 100bucks (or even more) goes to Cambridge. Just great -.-

4 comments:

Tin3tiNe said...

Hope u're happy with your decision. I dropped BIO too. and i feel so damn relieved now!

Copykate said...

tinetine: i know u dropped bio! read ur post and heard u talking abt it. surely it's a relief to let go of a burden XD

jayceeineukay said...

Told you so! Way to go, hopefully-praying-for scholar!

Copykate said...

jayceeineukay: yea, now that i've let go of a heavy burden, the least i can do is get 3 As. scholarship to uk! XD