Gloooooomy

I have been feeling rather gloomy and down these few days. Just when my mood is getting better today, the merciless wind came blowing hard and made my already-slanting wardrobe collapsed. Thank you very much, that should perfectly add on to my “reasons for being unhappy” list. Right now it’s lying still on my poor bed, and I’m still trying to figure out how to make it stand again. It’s impossible to remove the clothes from the inside since the zipper part headed straight down to the floor. I’m secretly wishing that someone would actually come to my place and offer his help without my asking. But heck, I don’t think that’s ever gonna happen. Looks like I’ve gotta manage the wardrobe possibly twice time my weight all on my own.

Why am I having such bad mood even though my period was already over last week? This has absolutely nothing to do with PMS. At night, I even experienced insomnia. So much turning and tossing on the bed, yet I couldn’t bring myself into the mysterious dreamland. It upset me so much that I actually started weeping. You know how awful it is to be awake in the middle of the night and having no one who could listen and talk to you. I scrolled down my contact list, assumed that some of them were asleep, some would take me as a nuisance for disturbing at such hour, and some, were just too dumb to ever understand me. Well, I admit, even I, after living for up to 18 years, don’t even understand myself. Is it just me, or is it that all women are complicated?

I’ve got almost everything I need and I want in my life, but why do I feel that I have nothing? Should I not feel contented for all the love and care I received? Then how could I, for no apparent reason, feel so sad and depressed? This is dreadful. I suspect that I am going through an early menopause. I am entering the ending phase of my life. I am going to turn old and ugly, with wrinkles all over my forehead, face, neck, hands, everywhere. Worst of all, I am going to lose my teeth and will no longer get to indulge in chocolate bars, even though it’s only for a few bites! By then, I can’t even walk without getting help from others, for I might just lose control of my steps, fall down and break all my weak bones. I am going to die in the kitchen while trying to stand on the chair and get hold of the candy jar. No one would even realize that I am dead, since they hardly realize my existence when I am alive. Then my cold and stiff body would remain on the kitchen floor, day and night being nibbled on by rats and cockroaches, until one day all my shattered bones rot and vaporize into the air. Till then, will I still be remembered?

Maybe I should for once start doing my Mathematics homework instead of talking about all these morbid stuff.

Pictures from last week, just to convince myself that I am not a dying old lady.



How can anyone live without shopping?



Gucci makes me happy.



My current wallpaper. Cute bo? Hiak hiak.



Took this pic before the security came shoo-ing us away. Look at my vain shopping partner!



The hawker stalls at Bukit Bintang, infronta Honda show room. I am so in love with the smoked chicken wings there!



My question for you: How would you feel if someone significant to you keeps telling you that you are dumb, stupid, clumsy and worthless?

a) Fight back with the bitch and if necessary, give her a slap on the face and tell her that you are definitely smarter than her. After all, she deserves the slapping.

b) Stop contacting him/her. Who needs a friend who sees only the negative side of you anyway?

c) Find a chance to tell him/her that you dislike those criticisms. It’s better than doing nothing or losing your friendship over it.

d) Get convinced that you are indeed stupid. You know you will never achieve anything great in your life after all.

e) Do nothing about it. You know your friend is way too immature and shallow to worth fighting with.

Wanna know my answer? You will never guess which option I choose! Jeez. Please tell me what you have chosen k? Or perhaps you have your own version other than the above abcde.

Ciaoz. Gotta deal with the after math of the wardrobe disaster.