Monday, November 12, 2007

SPM Reminiscence

Gawd, if I hadn’t skip Standard 4, I would be sitting for SPM right now, facing one of our life-time judgement! One year had passed since then. But it feels like I had just been through it yesterday. I still remember how we used to line up outside the exam hall, holding our transparent stationary cases and all. I told my friend how nervous I was and how much I wish it was over. When most of my classmates had finished their last paper, Biology, a few of us still had to get prepared for our Econs. Blame ourselves for taking extra subjects! But the A1 was still worthwhile. The day when our result was released, I could feel my stomach flinching. My hands turned as cold as an ice cube. I was even more uptight than those days when I sat for the papers. Finally my name was called. I knew I wasn’t one of those who scored perfect results. As I descended from the stage, tears rolled down like a stream. They weren’t tears of joy. They were tears of sadness and disappointment. I couldn’t bear to look at my results. 11A1 2A2. Perhaps I’ve expected too much of myself. It wasn’t at all satisfying. In fact it was much worse than I’ve predicted. The teachers and parents thought I was ridiculous. At that moment I thought my life was over. I thought I’ve flung my opportunity of obtaining a good scholarship. The picture of the straight A’s students was published in the newspaper, and I almost collapsed when I saw myself looking all sad and gloomy yet pretending to smile amongst the others. I almost wanted to kill Jess for getting straight A1’s. I thought I had always did better in class. The only thing I could be proud of was my 1119. But then again, who would give a damn if you got A1 for that?

But thank God, despite the 2A2 that almost ruined my result, in spite of the fact that I screwed up my JPA interview, I still managed to grab the scholarship! It was almost unbelievable. I had almost given up hope and was preparing to enter Matriculation. But that Friday morning, everything changed my life. Like any other JPA applicants, I woke up in the morning and switched on my laptop, only that I wasn’t putting too much hope. In fact, I wasn’t hoping for anything at all. I just wanted to check for the sake of checking. Bad net traffic. I couldn’t load the page at all. News of this friend and that friend whoever my friends who got this and that country soon reached me through MSN. Some offered to check for me but I turned them down immediately. Finally the moment was near. The first thing I saw was SUKACITA. I thought I had mistaken DUKACITA as SUKACITA. But then again, I saw TAHNIAH. I moved my head nearer to the screen, and rolled my eyes 2inches upward, and there it was, AMERIKA SYARIKAT!!! WTF is this all about???!!!! Did they mess up my IC number or what???? OMG I couldn’t believe my own eyes! I was going to America!!! Is that even possible? For my whole life, I’ve never thought of going to US! Yet now, the government is so kind enough to be sending me there! I was so excited that I could jump around and kiss everyone! I love you JPA! In fact, I thought that was the best deal among my friends. The rest of them got Australia, German, Poland and India. Tell me if mine isn’t the best??? For nights and nights I thanked God for that. I mean, right now I’m still thanking God for being so kind to me! I’m really fortunate compared to some of the others. I thought I was the luckiest girl in the world. Indeed, I am one real lucky girl. I couldn’t be more grateful for that.

The juniors are having their SPM starting from today. So,

All the best to all SPM candidates!

Pray hard if you want to be the second me =)

38 comments:

JPA scholars said...

hello..
i don't think there is any problem going to australia, poland, germany or india.
you think america is the best??!
sorry but i totally disagree with you.
pray hard to be the second you?
I would rather leave my god.
Please respect others in your typing.i guess Americans do not like rude people.May god bless you if you continue with your attitude in US.

Kate said...

yes, judging from certain aspect, i still think it is the best. doesn't mean those countries are no good though. it's merely my opinion. what's your problem?

see who's the one with attitude problem.

JPA scholars said...

sometimes, you just do not need to go everywhere and tell everyone that you are the luckiest girl who gets the JPA.
There is also no such need for you to announce that you think the country you have got is the best.
I believe, getting a chance to study is the luckiest thing in the world.
There is no need to compare with others and telling others that your deal is the best.Get it?
It is merely your opinion but you make it sounds like studying in other countries is something bad.
Well, it is not attitude problem, it might be your communication skill. Sorry if i misunderstood you in your post.
I advise you to improve your communication skill, though.

Anonymous said...

Act u shud go and check wat happen to ur seniors who flew to U.S before u pose tis...

Kate said...

it wasn't my communication skill. it's you who's prejudiced against me.

i wasn't comparing. the whole point of the entry is to wish the candidates this year good luck you see.

go improve your comprehension skill.

Kate said...

anon, they're doing good. for those whom i know, at least=)

Fu Han said...

Sue me for being biased, but I just had to comment.

First and foremost, I think that the only reason why she wrote that she's the luckiest girl ever is because she wasn't expecting it at all.

And, it's her opinion to think that the US is the best, and personally, I think it is one of the best few too, if not one of the best. I mean, liberal education academics, well-rounded system - these are just a few of the qualities of an American education.

*I know, I know, you're probably recollecting the VTech and 9/11 moments*

Oh, and regarding the "second me" thing, I think she was only referring to obtaining a scholarship. So cut her some slack.

And Kate! OMG la, you have more A1s than the number of subjects I took. EEE.

Fu Han said...

Oh yeah, and to JPA Scholars, please be reminded that you're not representing the whole JPA community but yourself, so you would like to remove the "S" from your username. Whee.

Yuinyi said...

well said fu han!

JPA scholar, since you think with a "S" is a prob. said...

i am leaving the comment with my friend.so i do not think there is any problem using plural right?
well, what i can say is her post is just so objective.everyone sees it with different aspect yea?
but you can not stop me from viewing her as wishing the spm candidates good luck in being herself, getting the best scholarship to the BEST country.

I ask you to improve your communication skill and you ask me to improve my comprehension skill. Be more creative, will you?

if i have to improve, then you got to improve also, along with your creativity. US needs creativity a lot, my truly advice.

another JPA scholarS said...

Shame on u!
I am ashamed u are part of us.
Precisely, i do not think that u are part of US (do not take it as US of USA).
At least WE would not go boasting around like U!
Please do not waste the taxpayer's money.
Shame on U!

Kate said...

i believe fu han has made it very clear.

you know what, i have over 100 readers per day. i don't think there's a need to entertain them all.

happy or not, it's my entry. love it or leave it.

u're free to throw your criticisms. however, it is not guaranteed that your comments will be taken into consideration.

have fun!=)

Kate said...

i do not think i am part of the nerdy berdy community either XD

Another Another jpa scholar said...

I absolutely agree with jpa scholar-S n Another jpa scholar-S! Stop bluffing - US IS THE BEST???? n jpa scholar-S are definitely rite. it's PLURAL!!! n it's not community - it's POPULATION! go n study your biology!

Kate said...

population?! HA-HA-HA XD

Anonymous said...

I totally agree that u have a very good luck compared to others. Maybe as what u said is true, u r the lukiest in the world. Yet, dont u know that the God gives u such a good luck is to help other people but not to boost around and tell everyone that u are the luckiest in the world and let all the people to admire u... Maybe u feel that feeling is great, but i can tell u that it is totally wrong. Im wondering who is ur God?? Appreciate wat we have and utilize it to help people is my belief. im not sure if ur God teach u to boost around because of u r the luckiest. If yes, im sorry about that and hope u can aplogise what i have written and continue to ur belief.

Kate said...

that wasn't boasting. if you even know how to spell "boast" correctly.

it's a way of expressing, yet some people are just prejudiced with their perception.

i dun get what you mean in ur last sentence. apologise what you have written? whatever you're trying to convey.

and btw, i dunno if you agree, but the fact is, there's only one God=)

Fu Han said...

Although I think they're probably all the same commenters, I'd treat each comment differently.

JPA scholar, since you think with a "S" is a prob:

Your previous comment tells me that you actually were commenting by yourself. As illustrated - "i don't think there is any problem going to australia, poland, germany or india.
you think america is the best??!", and "I would rather leave my god." Notice the "I"s.

AND OMGGGGGGGGGGGGG IT'S SUBJECTIVE (NOT 'OBJECTIVE' AS YOU PUT IT). YOU JUST CONTRADICTED YOURSELF.

another JPA scholarS:

Thank you for highlighting the plural note. Good for you, it seems that 12 years of grammar didn't go to waste, not like the taxpayers money. But if the citizens really did waste money on someone, it probably wouldn't be Kate because she's ever so sweet (OMG Kate, you know I like Gap and Banana Republic for my birthday right?)

Oh wait, maybe that grammar did go to waste - another JPA scholarS don't sound right.

Another Another jpa scholar: No, I prefer to stick to "community" thank you very much. But if you do insist, look up the dictionary for definition. This is why they always say there's more to education that the classroom, and biology simply does not apply in the blogosphere.

Fu Han said...

This is so fun. After scrutinizing the last sentence of "JPA scholar, since you think with a "S" is a prob."'s comment:

"I ask you to improve your communication skill and you ask me to improve my comprehension skill. Be more creative, will you? if i have to improve, then you got to improve also, along with your creativity. US needs creativity a lot, my truly advice."

No one never ever mentioned that you should improve your comprehension skills. And if your perception that US needs all these vital qualities as mentioned previously, I guess you should consider that there is no stereotype in any country, and you're making a false assumption. And for that, let me just point out that the country that you're going to needs some logic too.

MY TRULY ADVICE.

mickey said...

sweet my FOOT!!!
if she's sweet then even a monkey can be the oh-so-sweeter than her.
fu han shuddap ok wtfreak
of corz education in msia is not good,or else there will be no you.
this proves even jpa scholars are nothing to be proud of. No biggie ok. so what if u go America? can u even get into Harvard?? if u can then i dun mind u go around boasting like a fucking bitch.

I discriminate people that have to rely on other people to fight back d comments. Biology is an important aspect even in blogosphere, if not so, y don u speak using c++ language? try using
cout<<"Fu Han Speaks like a bloody gigolo and Kate is so sweet OMG? so fake!";

n r u psycho??who will leave d comment with different nicknames except u yourself mayb?

the first JPA scholar said...

No one never ever mentioned that you should improve your comprehension skills

Kate said...
it wasn't my communication skill. it's you who's prejudiced against me.

i wasn't comparing. the whole point of the entry is to wish the candidates this year good luck you see.

go improve your comprehension skill


GO CHECK YOUR EYESIGHT
fu han..r u blind or what?
any job and course in any country would need good eyesight.

i admit i mix up obj n subj.so??
better than your 'sweet' friend that embarrass JPA scholars!!

You are not part of the nerdy berdy community right?
DONT COME BACK TO INTEC NEXT JANUARY.

wonder why you and your friends love to quote me sooo much.

Fu Han said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
passer-by said...

i cant agree more with mickey.
kate isn't sweet but bitchy.
i wonder if kate would confess n apologise for her own fault.

Fu Han said...

mickey: HAHAHA! You wouldn't take it so seriously right? SWEET is "objective" and if I think that she's sweet, that's my issue. And getting into Harvard couldn't possibly give you the right to blog like a "INSERT FOUL WORDS". I'm sorry I don't learn Biology, and I see no correlation of Biology to blogging, and thus, I assume that the dictionary would be the closest source of reference. Even the first JPA scholar seems to agree with the fact that it's community:

"You are not part of the nerdy berdy community right?" he asks.

First JPA scholar: Wow, where did the "S" go. Re: skills - I truly apologize for the misunderstanding. But forgive me, I couldn't possibly understand anyone who would combine two comments into one without addressing the party he's speaking to. I mean, who actually says that his mistake is better than the faults of others! INTEC isn't yours and you know what? I'm definitely coming back to prove you wrong. See you soon!

PS - I don't like to quote you, it's just that I do. You see, sometimes we have to do stuff that we don't like, one of them would be to go to travel to a country that we dislike.

You know what, this is getting pretty boring, comment all you want, but I refuse to have a circular argument, unless someone could possibly put forth an outstanding form of objection. Kudos to you!

JuDy said...

wow.very controversial.but anyway,good job kate. =)

Anonymous said...

Well, its not getting about the best country or anything...
All of you out there miss the point of getting JPA scholarship !
It's for us to serve our country, our motherland...
So what if I got sent to New Zealand ?
So what my friend got sent to Czech for medic?
Well that's fine to me...
If you think going to USA is so cool & big, well think again...
You probably dont deserve this scholarship anyway... You have no sense of gratitude...
What point is it arguing these?
Ask yourself, will you serve your country with what you have obtained from foreign country?
Oh I forgot...
You may not even pass the requirements to get to fly or u do shitly in ur SAT & no university wants u with that bitchy attitude of yours...
End up in no-where-land...
Poor thing...
Well, I get to fly! Haha!
Don't be such a bitch & embarass all the other JPA scholars...

A friend of JPA scholar...

Fu Han said...

You know what, you're actually right. But it's just that when you actually have some people commenting so rudely when the person isn't really making a scathing remark, it's just wrong.

I think you're brilliant, and I see no reason why Harvard, Cambridge, ANU, would not be fighting to give you a spot. Haha.

Ausmatian said...

well i will make it clear this time.
Kate, if you think JPA scholars are nerdy and you are ashame of being part of it, INTEC dont welcome you.

Fu han, i never stop you from coming back to intec, that sentence is dedicated to her. Of course INTEC is not mine, but if anyone thinks studying here will be pointed as nerdy, then one might as well drop it. Many more will appreciate the scholarship than you do.

Judy, i wonder how you think when the country that you are going is regarded as worse country by some brainless people. I wonder what you think when people call you nerdy berdy community and you still can say she is doing a good job.

JPA scholar said...

the post above is by me, but i think i got to use ausmatian as nickname.

as the above comment i would like to dedicate it to judy.

Anonymous said...

Kate, I have seen a lot in your previous posts that you are a 'devoted Christian' and also the way you talk/gossip about others. I have no rights to judge you, only God can, but I only want to leave you with this verse - The Lord mock proud mockers but shows favor to the humble (Proverbs 3:34) Tonight, do meditate on those words. God has created us in His image, so why be a worldly Christian instead of Godly Christian?

not the previous anonymous said...

anonymous, i totally agree with you !

i'm kind of sick wit her quoting phrases from the bible, trying to show how Christian she is, with all the words, but deep down inside, she is so shallow..

perhaps those phrases are quoted intentionally by her to create a 'devoted Christian' IMAGE !

DEEP DOWN INSIDE, SHE IS DARKER THAN SATAN !

lexy said...

Hey guys, I understand that this post could be viewed in the wrong light. But it seems that she's only expressing how lucky she is to have been given the scholarship by JPA. And yes, she did say that America is better than the other countries but that's her opinion and we can only take it or leave it. Doesn't the US dictate freedom of speech? There is nothing wrong with saying that US is better... it is a prejudiced statement (and with all honesty, I don't even like the US), but don't tell me none of you can see where she's coming from.

We have all had our prejudiced moments before. Let's not be self-righteous and pick on Kate, just because we can. She's human too :)

Nick said...

agree with lexy. :)

american prog student said...

mickey: using c++ language?

cout<<"so funny la you LOL";
cout<<"of course they dont use it";
cout<<"they will only learn it next sem laa";
cout<<"so do forgive them for not knowing it";
cout<<"LOL";

oh man! mickey u remind me of c++!!

i miss c++ and pn zainura soooo much!!
i wish i could learn it again =) =)=)

ASEAN Scholar said...

LOL you JPA guys are funny. Fighting over such petty things. Whatever she wants to say. Let it be. Not that it affects you rite? Not that that Malay girl thingy where it directly hurt someone rite? You might say that India is the best or something but there are another few thousand people out there who disagree so accept it. Its just a way of life. You guys too immersed in your studies or smth? Get a life. Don't waste time reading and commenting this blog if you can't accept it and arguing there and there about who's language skills are the best.

AbangChua said...

YEAH Man LEXY. Whoever u are :)

Jpa scholar who is goin to US said...

What is wrong with u guys?
madness..
quarelling over small things

Anonymous said...

I think this is a really stupid argument. First JPA scholar, I have no idea why you feel so burnt if you really do think that anywhere is as good as the US. This is Kate's blog, so she says what she wants, and she doesn't blog to please you!

Not that I think Kate is a nice girl, but well, that's who she is. Anyway it's not like she went overboard and said NYAH NYAH I GOT THE USA AND YOU DIDN'T or something. You act like a sore loser...though she wasn't even trying to provoke you in the first place.

Anyway she's perfectly justified in her opinion in saying that USA is the best. Check the latest THES rankings and see for yourself (unless you want to poke imaginary holes in the accuracy of the rankings lol the way Malaysian politicians did). She's just quoting general opinion and well, her own preference too, and it doesn't call for you to examine her attitude, but your own primitive mindset.